I couldn't really give this post devoted to IKEA a number on the list. That's not to say I won't come back to it later but first of all, technically, IKEA is Swedish. Secondly, in the absence of polling average Danes on the street, my Google search "Do Danes like IKEA?" popped up a number of articles from a couple years ago about how Danes felt insulted that IKEA named all their lesser household furnishings after their towns while other Nordic coutries got to grace their more upscale furniture. They literally felt like Danish doormats. You can read all about it here.
As an American who never had the privilege of living near an IKEA, I never really got IKEA. Now living in Denmark, I'm not even sure I would have totally gotten IKEA even if I had. Growing up and well into my adulthood, I only knew of IKEA as a place that had cheap stuff. I think a lot of Americans have that idea about the store and they're not wrong per se but they're really missing out on so much more.
A fateful trip to Scandinavia's second largest IKEA
Americans have a real addiction to cheap stuff. It's a defining quality that we look for in our shopping experience, always hunting for bargains, sometimes to the point of insanity as evidenced by Black Friday stampedes and such. IKEA is an interesting social commentary on how Scandinavians do view cost as a decision-making factor but refuse to sacrifice quality, aesthetics, efficiency and functionality in the process.
I didn't fully appreciate the devotion to form and function that IKEA takes until I visited for the first time. Walking through our now local store, I came across "concept apartments" - fully decked out, functionally operational, liveable spaces. But here's the IKEA catch. These demo dwellings are roughly 270 sq ft for a single person, 375 sq ft for a couple and a palatial 590 sq ft that's set up for a family with a young child. And yes, this is including a bathroom and kitchen! To most Americans, this would be viewed as either a funny joke or some granola-crunchy grad student's master's thesis.
Could you live like this?
And why not laugh away? America lives large. We're not used to thinking about form and functionality in our daily lives. We have so much excess square footage to fill that we don't care if it saves space as long as it saves money. When we do have the luxury of thinking thoughtfully about design and sustainability, it's often in these odd American paradoxes like the Boulder, Colorado, question of how to get a 9,400 square foot mansion to have as small an ecological footprint as possible.
But here in Copenhagen, these are not just hypothetical questions or philisophical debates. It's reality. Whole families live in apartments and houses the size of the average American garage. Owning less stuff isn't a campaign or New Year's resolution, it's a practical solution when having to face sleeping on your balcony because you have too much stuff in your two-room apartment.
Prepared for overwhelmed Americans with a room to lay down
So I think I finally get IKEA. Unlike Wal-mart where everything is just plain cheap, IKEA is cheap with a purpose, with a world-view, with style. Maybe in America we won't learn to restrain ourselves until we are truly constrained in the economic and physical ways that Europe is. That won't stop me from hoping or trying to adopt this new way of living. Besides, when's the last time you heard yourself say, "I just went to Wal-Mart and, man, it was mind-blowing!"
Now wipe that smug American smirk off your face because I'm talking about Strollers of Unusual Volume.
Living life for the first time without a car, I've developed a keen interest - okay covetous jealousy - of my Danish neighbors' automobiles. Every day brings new wonders to these American eyes. I've seen four adults get out of a Peugot the size of a small loveseat and been amazed that having no trunk doesn't seem to be a deterrent to European auto owners.
With all this novelty to distract me, it took a while to notice that something was missing from Copenhagen's landscape. The all-American sport utility vehicle!
Look Ma, no Suburbans!
I can literally count on one hand the number of sport utility vehicles I've seen - three Range Rovers and a Porche Cayenne that almost ran me over the other day. Oh well, at least if I'm going to be squashed like a pedestrian bug I'll go out with a luxurious bang.
But I digress.
Back to the real Danish SUV's. If sport utility vehicles are what America runs on then these mega-strollers are the Danish urban answer to the age old question of how to schelp your family and their stuff around town. Now put away all your silly notions of cheap plastic pieces of crap 'cause these ain't yo' mama's Gracos.
In these behemoths of the sidewalk, Danish children are protected from the elements, bundled into nests of blankets and waterproof coverings, and tethered to the stroller lest they try to escape. Underneath these mobile bedrooms is enough room to stow three mega boxes of diapers and a case of beer. Or eight bottles of Coke, two pillows and an orchid plant. All perfectly reasonable (and totally true) combinations.
Just like their American counterparts, you can plunk down some serious dough on these Danish SUV's. A quick check online and I discover a top of the line Odder (one of the brands used by Crown Princess Mary no less) runs roughly $1,700! Same goes for another popular brand, Emmaljunga. Don't even think about it unless you've got at least $1,000 burning a hole in your piggy bank. At least I can sleep at night knowing Danish parents aren't raiding their childrens' college savings accounts to buy these things since higher education is free here.
And despite such high-profile (royal!) usage, I also want to be clear that these are not just high-end strollers you have to go to some gentrified, hip neighborhood to find. They are used nearly universally by young and old alike - apparently they last forever and I occasionally see elderly women using them more like shopping carts. Did I mention they can hold anything?
So here I thought we splurged when we spent $300 on our son's Baby Jogger. I guess we'll have to reach a bit higher if we want to keep up with the Jensens here in Denmark...
This post is just an indication that it's time for me to get out of the malls and back into the real world. I will try to keep things PG since I know I'm at the age where more and more of my friends have kids. And yikes so do I!
Since before Christmas I'd been seeing lingerie pop up everywhere. It was featured prominently in the Frederiksberg Shopping Center's revolving door display. It was on billboards at the Metro station. It was being bought by the bagload at H&M's pre-Christmas sales.
And then we moved out to our new apartment across from Northern Europe's largest shopping mall, Field's. There are at least three stores devoted exclusively to lingerie as well as bigger department stores like H&M and Magasin which have lingerie departments. And boy is the selection extensive! You can find everything from granny panties to risque ensembles all in your average, run of the mill shops.
And then there's this...
As if I needed any more confirmation that I now live in a country with a more permissive, open attitude toward sexuality. We Americans tend to like these kind of shops relegated to lonely industrial roads and major highway truck stops. Or we make them stand alone so it's clearly obvious to everyone where you are headed and there's no possibility that you got lost on the way to Barnes & Noble.
This particular store is located directly across the way from the entrance to Magasin in the mall. I will attempt to translate this into American-speak. Imagine, if you will, the nicest, most upscale shopping center in your tri-state area. Now imagine right across the entrance to Nordstrom's there is a Frederick's of Hollywood. I challenge anyone to show me a mall in the U.S. that devotes this kind of prime retail space to this pursuit.
Lesson of the day: Don't run. Don't hide. Get used to it. Naked old couples in bed can sell you cell phones, the weather report can occassionally be delivered without a top, and stores at the mall can lead to fruitful discussions with your children on anatomy and human behaivor.
